This is going to be a negative, self loathing, complaint filled post, so if you’re not down with that, I suggest you wait for my next post 🙂
June is filled with fun things! Because of this, my shops will all be closed periodically.
I’ve been toying with the idea of putting my art on products for some time now, but this week I have been putting in the work to actually make it happen. As an artist, it’s such an exciting thing to have ways to get your art out into the world, without necessarily having to sell all your originals. Now, that’s not to say I don’t want to sell ANY of my original works, because believe me, I have STACKS of paintings in my home… but I also have my favorites hanging on my walls, and I have grown accustomed to seeing them there.
I don’t do well on my own. It’s taken a long time for me to admit this to myself. For some reason, there’s a certain stigma attached to the idea that someone can’t be alone. I don’t care anymore. I can’t be honest with myself or anyone else if I don’t admit that.
I’m back! The last few weeks have been a little overwhelming, what with the preparing for my Arts Walk, the cancelling of my Arts Walk, the mental breakdown that came from said cancellation, and then picking myself back up from feeling pretty lousy about the whole thing. I also was without a phone for almost a whole week which was extremely frustrating, due to the necessity of apps like Instagram and Snapchat for my art, as well as Poshmark for selling my clothes. But this week I have a temporary phone, and a little room to breathe.
A few weeks ago I began the journey to a healthier me. As a kid and a teenager, I always felt self conscious about the fact that I was bigger than a lot of other kids my age. I wasn’t necessarily fat, I was just bigger and taller. As I got older, I was pretty happy with my size, even though I was still bigger than my best friend, who was 6 inches shorter than me and a size 4/5. She was very athletic, always into sports and running, and I was not.
Physical education was the class I dreaded most in junior high, because of my asthma. After a few small asthma attacks, I ended up getting a doctor’s note to excuse me from running the mile, but I still hated having to play any sports in class, because I am so uncoordinated. Eventually, I was excused from P.E. altogether, and would sit in the library doing reports for my teacher.